A letter to my best friend without kids

Hey girl,

It’s not you. It’s me.

Life with young children is busy, exhausting, messy, and at times overwhelming.

I promise I don’t intentionally try to ignore you when you call,

but life with a toddler is pretty chaotic without any dull or quiet moments.

I guess I could answer your call when I am in the middle of my son throwing a tantrum, or when I am cooking, cleaning, picking up food from the floor or off of my son’s face.

But I want to give you my undivided attention and talk to you without any distractions just like before.

I am sure you wouldn’t mind the screaming in the background, or the constant pauses in our conversation for me to yell no,or stopping mid-sentence so I can run and stop my son before he hurts himself trying to grab that one item he knows he can’t have.

But I do mind.

I want to be able to sit, relax and actually enjoy an adult conversation when you call- without any distractions!

In general, women are great multi-taskers. But when you call before bedtime, I am already doing five things at one time.

Nap time is another great time for you to call.

But with your work schedule, and my toddler’s unpredictable nap time schedule, we are going to have to find and schedule a good time to talk, which is usually after bedtime.

I know you wonder why I can’t just give my son to my husband at night, but the evenings are our busiest times that require all hands on deck in order for me to make dinner, feed Keo, clean up the mess, do bath-time, and our other nightly routines.

The truth is I am in a season of my life where texting is the easiest form of communication.

I have small, short pauses in my day in which texting allows me to communicate with you little-by-little over a longer period of time.

But at least I will be able to communicate!

If you decide to have kids, you will understand a little bit more about what I am talking about,and if you do, I promise I will be your number one fan and your biggest support system!

I will understand you and be able to relate with how fun and crazy those first years of motherhood are.

If you don’t call me back, I will understand because finally getting a moment to just sit, breathe, maybe drink warm (not cold or 3x re-heated) coffee, shamelessly watch your favorite show reality show, or finally be with your husband is gold.

It might not feel like it, but I promise I still love you and appreciate our friendship more than ever before.

This might not seem like it is true because we don’t speak as much as you or I would like, but becoming a mom has shown me what true love looks like and what matters in life, and you are at the top of that list.

One day things will normalize again, even though I secretly hope they don’t because that means my son will be grown up and wont need me anymore.

For now, this is my crazy, busy, always messy and definitely sleep-deprived season I am in, but like all seasons… it passes.

You were, still are, and will always be my best friend.

As Always,

Your tired mama friend

A letter to my best friend without kids
A letter to my best friend without kids

Here is a little mommy humor that accurately describes my day and life as a mama 😉




  1. Jenny @ Paint & Pillows | 27th Aug 17

    Yes! This! So much! My bestie is also childless, and likely to remain that way. I so want her to know how much I still love and cherish her, even if we can’t connect as often as we used to <3

  2. Mary Ware | 27th Aug 17

    Love this. It can be so lonely without those friends, but can be hard for them to understand what life is like for us as Mamas as well.

  3. Joleen | 27th Aug 17

    Sadly this can be true, but I found I needed my friends even more when I had a toddler. I know they didn’t always “get it” when I would be distracted but I needed that connection. 🙂

  4. Beth Newcomb | 27th Aug 17

    I relate to this so much it’s not even funny. Perfectly sums up motherhood, especially the toddler years. ❤

  5. Ashley houston | 31st Aug 17

    I have been really wanting to write something similar to my friends without kids. It’s so hard for them to understand!

  6. Kermilia | 6th Oct 17

    Loved his post! This is exactly the season of life I’m in with my best friend and once I added blogging to the mix, we’ve just grown distant. Still love her but we’re just in two different places right now. Such an awesome post.

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